I want a whore.................

I was on my way back from the city airport heading into Belfast city centre hotel.

In the back was an Indian looking fella all very business looking you know the type expensive suit,bling watch and designer luggage.

We had been chatting most of the way about the usual crap like football, how much Wayne Rooney looks like Shrek, the price of fuel and of course was i busy tonight.

(yes people really do ask this)

Anyhoo he had made a point of telling me he had just became a dad again and telling me all about his family which is why when he asked me the question i have to admit i was a bit flummoxed.

"So mate where's the best massage parlour around here im going to need a little company while im over here."

I didnt know what to say to tell ya the truth.

Belfast i am sure has such establishments but i don't know where they are!

Sure like most of the folks in Belfast I know where the ladies of negotiable affection hang about.

I even run a few of them from there homes to there corner of choice in the city centre and most of these ladies are scary, hard as nails and to be honest some have more facial hair than i do.

But a brothel no i dont know where there is one and to the best of my knowlage i have never taken a fare to one.

Maybe what ever fellas use them in belfast they walk i dont know!

I am not even sure i would have told this fella if i did because any brothels i have heard being busted by the police where run by various paramilitarys .

He didn't believe  me when i told him that i didn't know of anywhere like that and tried offering me money i suppose to warm my memory up!!

I think he finally believed me after much protesting and asked me "surely belfast has a red light district".

"It does but only if you are willing to call a few streets a district" I replied.

"Great well where are these streets then?" he grinned back.

"Your staying in one of them" I replied taking  for his fare.

I would have loved to have picked him up again just to see if he visited the ladies of negotiable affection to find out if facial hair put him off!

BTD